43/365

Today's YFC Qatar's 2nd National Conference.

Is it selfish of me to desire that I was with them right this very moment, praising, worshipping, jumping, screaming, dancing, praying, loving?

Because that's exactly what I want to do this very moment.

I want time to stop and bring me to Qatar today. I want to go back to home. I want to experience how it feels like to be a YFC Qatar leader once again. I want to reminisce everything once again. I want to live the life they're living right now. I miss them so much it's currently making me selfish. I miss them so much I'm having the impulse to just... go back.

Qatar has always been my first home and YFC one of my first families. ALWAYS.

So yeah, if you guys are reading this, just remember that someone in the Philippines believes in you guys. Whenever you feel the impulse to break away and to give up, remember that someone here is wishing for nothing but your happiness. Whenever you feel like quitting, remember that I'm willing to give everything up just to switch places with you guys.

Whenever you feel that you're not happy with YFC, think of me and think about how I feel.

I'm praying for you guys. This is a victory already. I love every single one of you. I want you to never EVER forget that. Forgetting that means forgetting what we've been through over the years.

<3

42/365

The best friend and I had a date today. :)

It's refreshing to see someone you were positively sure you'll never miss when you go to college because you practically spent your childhood together. I guess we're tired of each other's faces already, but it doesn't mean we're tired of each other's presence.

We watched Inception (it was my second time to watch it so I annoyed her with my reciting of lines) and then we had a quick dinner at KFC.

Then when we went to Fully Booked, MLTR's Someday It's Gonna Make Sense began to play on the radio.

Gah, everything about today was just a Qatar trade-off. It was only for a few hours but it teleported me even for a moment back to Qatar when the biggest problems we had was the zit on our foreheads and the report we had to make for the next day.

41/365

I currently have the worst bout of migraine and stomach cramps ever. In fact, earlier today, I kind of passed out in class and I had to rush to the washroom near the end of the class because I threw my insides up.

I feel like a zombie. A dead zombie. Quite an exaggeration, but exaggeration is not to be taken lightly when one's in pain.

I saw someone today, though. Actually, two someones.

[via]

Random fact: My brother and I are Cyanide and Happiness junkies. I've been - for weeks now - trying to get him hooked on Cracked.com but to no avail.

40/365

I often wondered how I would want to die.

I once thought it'd be beautiful to die while saving someone from death. Then I realized too many people have died that way and not many were given credit.

Then I thought, a gun in the head? A knife on my wrist?

I don't know. I can never know.

I could never die.

I'm Alyxa, and I'm doomed to be forever immortal.

39/365

I fell for him. This shouldn't have happened.

38/365

I have one song that's been on repeat on my playlist for days now. I don't know why I should be getting smitten over something like this, though; I'm not one to show too much emotion, let alone listen to such mushy tunes...

But yeah, sometimes hormones just get in the way of everything else. 

Skillet - Yours to Hold

Lyrics:

I see you standing here

But you’re so far away

Starving for your attention

You don’t even know my name

You’re going through so much

But I know that I could be the one to hold you

[Chorus:]

Every single day

I find it hard to say

I could be yours alone

You will see someday

That all along the way

I was yours to hold

I was yours to hold

I see you walking by

Your hair always hiding your face

I wonder why you’ve been hurting

I wish I had some way to say

You’re going through so much

Don’t you know that I could be the one to hold you

[Bridge:]

I’m stretching but you’re just out of reach

You should know

I’m ready when you’re ready for me

And I’m waiting for the right time

For the day I catch your eye

To let you know

That I’m yours to hold

[Altro:]

I’m stretching but you’re just out of reach

I’m ready when you’re ready for me