He was most things I promised myself I hated.

He was self-righteous, a pompous ass, a know-it-all, a dog-phobic and a bully. It's like every inch of him was shouting at me to stop staring, stop daydreaming and just continue to live my life as if he wasn't already a part of it.

But it was his presence that was so intoxicating.

After all, even if he were most things I hate, he were some things I loved, too. He was smart. He was dedicated, loyal, amazing with instruments, and he made me laugh. More importantly, he sat beside me that night, erased all awkwardness between us, and just talked. About school, about life, about the world and everything in it.

It's amazing how I can hate his very presence one moment and be infatuated with everything he is the next. I don't know how he does it, or if he knows I'm hopelessly sucked in..

..but I'm not willing to let go. Not just yet.

This is one hell of a roller coaster ride, and I'm dangling off the edge, but I'm going to see how it goes.